The greatest challenge to every adult is to be a parent. Nobody teaches us this ability. We improvise, analyzing the situation, considering if we act properly – sometimes more often sometimes quite rare. There are some basic rules of conduct and obeying them influences child’s functioning significantly in a positive way.
- Talk to your child always, everywhere and about everything. The more often you talk to your child, the better you understand their world, expectations, dreams but also problems.
- Always try to find some time to talk, when your child has a problem. Conversation helps to get rid of bad feelings. When a child feels helpless or hurt, let him speak to you, cry or show some anger. Try to understand and advise him/her wisely. Do not pass off their problems.
- Find also time when a child wishes to share his/her happiness or success. Show your contentment, praise him/her, ask about the details of the day. Do not diminish the importance of the success. Emphasize that you are proud of him/her. It gives them self confidence and encourages to further achievements.
- Try to notice some signals showing that a child needs you. When they have a problem, they do not always ask for help. Sometimes they try to avoid you, whereas sometimes they want to be close, move impatiently or wait.
- Create circumstances to casual talk. Take advantage of natural moments e.g. when drinking tea, eating dinner or supper, while having a walk. Create the atmosphere to evening talks, suggest spending free time together – in a way that will also be interesting for him/her.
- Show interest to his/her matters, however do not put pressure and ask intensively. Wait until a child starts speaking by itself what happens in his surroundings. It is a child who decides how much information he/she wants to share. Respect this.
- Also talk about situations that have happened to you recently, about your problems and plans. Ask about their opinions in different matters and show them that you appreciate their opinion.
- Talk about yourself. Children like listening to memories about the youth ages of their parents. These kind of chats get you closer to each other, as it reminds your child that his/her parent was also young. Nevertheless, do not present yourself as an ideal person, tell about your mistakes and how you learned to take difficult decisions.
- Talk on every subject, do not avoid difficult themes. Make sure that in your house there are no taboo issues. Also talk about your worries. Be an adviser rather than an expert.